Chris has been absolutely dreamy thus far as Illbilly lead guitarist...at least it's seemed so to the rest of the Illbillys; perhaps Chris himself is burning with some sort of inner torment, but he seems absolutely free of the kind of attitude and behavior one would expect from someone of his talent. Any moment now, he'll be demanding green M&M's with three quarters of their shell replaced by a paste made from evaporated milk and powdered Andean yak horn in his personal dressing room (decorated in the style of King Tut's tomb but with floor coverings from Czar Nicholas I's palace) before each show.